Learning to be a peacemaker

October 2, 2009

Where two or three are gathered...there's a conflict waiting to happen.

That very truthful quote, can be found on the back of the book written by Ken Sande called, Peacemaking for Families: A Biblical Guide to Managing Conflict in Your Home. It aptly describes my home for the last few months. A couple of weeks ago, conflict became a full blown cyclone that threatened to destroy our family, thus, I went on vacation. Vacation from blogging and also on a five day trip with my family to Texas, to visit friends to get some distance and to be nurtured by friends who love us. It was a healing time. More on that later...

When the cyclone of conflict hit our home, our pastor spent 5+ hours in two days time, to help us. Think of it as the emergency team that comes to rescue a town after it's been hit by a disaster. The emergency care helps you get your feet on the ground and somewhat stable, but the rebuilding and recovery will take time and lots of it. That's where we are now, in the recovery and rebuilding of our family and home. Pastor Eric put it this way:

There is a serpent in your home. You need to cut its head off.
That startling statement caused my heart to tremble. Sin had taken root in our home. Selfishness, idolatry, jealousy, bitterness, anger, pride, to name a few....It was time to stop being a peacebreaker and time to learn how to be a peacemaker.

With Russ at the lead and me learning to follow, we had our first family meeting time last night. We read and discussed the first chapter of Peacemaking for Families. The first principle we are practicing is overlooking an offense. Many of the conflicts we have had could have been avoided by simply following this simple principle.

Many disputes are so insignificant that they should be resolved by quietly overlooking an offense. "A man's wisdom gives him patience; it is to His glory to overlook an offense" (Proverbs 19:11). Overlooking an offense is a form of forgiveness, and involves a deliberate decision not to talk about it, dwell on it or let it grow into pent-up bitterness or anger. ~Ken Sande
Our God is faithful. He will help us persevere...

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